Use Conversation to Engage Your Grandkids

It’s called the “art” of conversation for a reason. When you think about it, conversation is an art‚ open to back and forth, improvisation, and hopefully —the harmony of beautiful music. Okay, so it’s probably slightly different when grandparents try to launch a good and comfortable dialogue with grandkids. Nanas and grandpops love their grandchildren to the moon and back, but learning to communicate effectively with them can require some (easy) skill-building.

Kavin Wadhar is the developer of the KidCoachApp. He created the app when he realized that the conversations he was having with his own two kids were, shall we say, less than engaging. Wadhar offers several tips on how to enhance verbal communication with youngsters:

• Ask why (a lot!)
• Start closed, then open. This means, beginning with a small question that naturally jumps to larger ones. For example: “What are 10 things you could use a cup for? Yes, the obvious answer is “to drink out of.” But a couple of other fun, imaginative responses are “as a hat” or “as a drum.”
• Say silly stuff. (This one requires no explanation.)
• Offer plenty of praise and encouragement.
• Use key questions. For example: Why do you think that? Can you give me an example of what you mean? What could happen next?

Be Approachable

1. It sounds simple, but putting yourself at a child’s eye level makes launching a conversation easier. (Consider this: Adults wouldn’t feel comfortable if they had to converse with someone twice their height.)
2. Smile and make eye contact, but make sure to leave a child plenty of personal space so they don’t feel intruded upon.
3. Find a point of connection. Think about what a specific kid is interested in. For instance: If a child loves video games, ask them why they like a specific game. What are the features it involves? Why is it better than other games? If you could change something about the game, what would it be?
4. Listen carefully so you can follow up with another good question. Adults often make the mistake of turning the conversation back to themselves, which is a turn-off for kids—especially if the dialogue is just starting.
5. Follow the child’s lead. Kids often feel that adults are talking “at them,” so when grown-ups settle in and listen, children lean into just being themselves. (And doing so helps develop their self-confidence.)
6. Never push. If a child doesn’t respond after you’ve tried with two or three questions, back off. They may be shy or simply not in the mood to chat.

Fun Helpers

These three tools are aids to starting out, and the first is a huge boost when getting to know anyone, not just a child.

The Ungame

Created 50 years, ago, this non-competitive conversation board game displays amazing staying power. In the Ungame, players move around the board with the aid of a die and answer questions —sharing thoughts, ideas, and feelings. Other players must listen and respond only when prompted.

Little Talk: A Tool for Bigger Conversations with Children

Games like this bring new fun and meaning to “family time.” The deck features 50 cards with various prompts to help adults connect with kids, encourage self-expression, inspire personal development from a young age, and build self-acceptance while helping kids to feel seen and heard. Sample questions from the Little Talk deck: What’s your current main goal? Where do you want to visit? What is your best quality, according to your friends?

KidCoach

The app mentioned earlier in this post offers a quick, convenient way to launch into an interesting convo with kids. One parenting expert recommends it as “wonderfully engaging. ”KidCoach is geared to children 6-12 years old. For example, two thought-provoking questions are: If you had to cross a river, how would you do it? How should we explore new planets? After using the app, one person said,” I love that the questions don’t rely on a right or wrong answer. Plus, they involved a good level of debate. Useful prompts are featured in each question card if the kids, or you, get stuck.”

Visiting Angels in Wheeling, WV

Visiting Angels Wheeling proudly serves Wheeling and the Upper Ohio Valley. If you or a loved one needs home care, we’d welcome the opportunity to get together and tell you about our range of services, which include everything from companion care to dementia care and respite care. Message us to schedule a free in-home consultation at your convenience. Or contact us at (304) 214-5550 with questions or to schedule a home visit.